Most cases of all kinds settle before the parties ever get to court. You and your spouse can agree to settle all of the issues resulting from a separation and make a private agreement instead of battling it out in court. There are many paths to settlement.
If you and your spouse are unable to reach an agreement without the help of a third party, there are at least two excellent up-front mediators our firm has worked with. I will be happy to recommend them to you. There are other mediation approaches discussed below. Up-front mediation is different in that no suit is ever filed. The parties sit down with the mediator and compile a list of agreed-upon deal points, which are reduced to a few pages. The parties then each hire his and her own lawyer to convert the deal into a formal contract.
Under North Carolina law, with few exceptions, all child custody cases will go to mediation. As soon as a child custody case is filed in court, the parties are ordered to attend a form of mediation provided by the State at a very low cost.
Custody mediation involves three steps – attend an educational class called “Parenting Under Two Roofs,” attend mediation orientation, then attend the mediation itself. Your lawyer will not attend the mediation session with you, but you should review the agreement with your attorney after the session. Successful child custody outcomes depend on the parents’ ability to see the world through their children’s eyes. An excellent video below is providing insight into the way children see things.
Also, under North Carolina law, you will be required to mediate the spousal support (if any), child support, and property distribution claims. This mediation is private, lawyers participate, and the mediator, a lawyer, charges typical lawyer fees.
